Monday, April 4, 2016

45!

I know it's been a while since I last posted.  I haven't had much to say.  Things have been very hard for me since the miscarriage last year.  I was in a dark, anxious place and was having a really tough time pulling myself out of it.  I hadn't had AF since the cycle right after my mc last May.  I was walking around anxious that I was going to have a heart attack and die. And, the pounds have just piled on. It was awful.  I finally went to my Dr and was prescribed Anti-anxiety meds. She also said I was extremely low in vitamins D and B12. Well, after a couple of months taking the drugs and the supplements I am finally feeling like me again.  The anxiety is almost gone, the health anxiety is almost gone and AF has returned.  Crazy, right?!

For the most part, I have moved past the mc.  I still get sad sometimes and when that happens I acknowledge, feel what I need to feel and then move on.  I am getting there.

H and I will be celebrating our ten year anniversary in the fall...Around Valentine's day, he gave me a new diamond engagement ring.  It is truly beautiful and I love it (and him for keeping a promise he made to me when we got engaged).

I am writing because I am turning 45 tomorrow.  I cannot believe I am this old; time just flies by.  I am not sure how I feel about this birthday. Ambivalent at best.

Anyway, I don't know if anyone checks in on my little corner of the web anymore, but if you do know that I think of you often.