Still Searching

H. has been out of work since February. He's applied at hundreds of jobs and come close a couple of times, but to no avail. Things are getting very tight financially and I am getting really worried. He is still in good spirits, but it is hard for him to just sit and wait every day to hear if someone wants to hire him.

I have been looking for something new to do full time as well. I have a couple of option in the early stages and should know soon if anything will pan out. I really hope that one of them find out.

Tomorrow is Halloween and there is a party at Little G's daycare. I am getting off work early to go and see their parade of costumes and enjoy the party. G is going as a  cupcake - her costume is super cute. Hopefully, I'll have some photos to post here from the party.

On the whole theme of still searching, I am still searching for peace with the decision not to use our frozen embryos. In my heart of hearts, I would love to have another baby. It scares me to think about going through the newborn stuff again, the sleepless nights, the anxiety of not knowing if I'm doing things right. Just being even older than I was the first time. It's pretty clear with H out of work that we are not financially stable enough to try again even if we wanted to.

G remains the light of my life. She is talking more and more each day and is so much fun. I love picking her up from daycare each day and singing songs in the car on the way home. It's pretty cute how much she wants to be able to sing along and really belts out the words she knows for sure. And, at night when I put her to bed, she now requests the songs she wants to hear.

Overall, despite H not having a job, life is good.

Happy Belated Thanksgiving!

Up here in the Great White North, this past weekend was our Thanksgiving. I hosted for the first time ever (well, H& Little G and I hosted). We had my parents, my Grandmother, my Father in Law, my brother & his wife and his wife's sister for dinner. I made a 14lb turkey, sausage & apple stuffing, home-made cranberry sauce and mini sea salt and caramel apple hand pies. I got the hand pie recipe from pinterest.com and it turned out fantastic! The rest of the guests contributed food to round out the meal. It was amazing. The turkey was fabulous as was all of the food, and it was great to have the family together.

It was a pretty jam-packed weekend - Saturday was my Grandmother's 85th birthday. We had a surprise party for her at one of her favourite restaurants. There were about 40 of us there. It's been a long time since that many of the family have come together. (My Mom is one of eleven kids and there were four generations of the family there).

Sunday was the day we hosted dinner although Monday is the 'real' Thanksgiving day. On Monday, we went to a birthday party for a two year old.It was pretty fun watching her open all of her presents and then seeing Little G and her playing together. They would be fighting over a toy and then M would lean over and hug G to say sorry. So cute!

The rest of October is pretty busy as well, we have something going basically every weekend. Which reminds me I need to book a hotel room for our anniversary present. H and I are going away for a weekend to see a play and Little G is staying with my folks.

Hmm, let's see what else is new? Even though G's birthday is a couple of months away, she is already entering the terrible twos. The meltdowns are a sight to behold. When she gets going and stamping her feet I have to remind myself not to laugh at her. I have been trying the "i hear you and am here for you when you're ready" routine with her and it seems to work when we're at home. We haven't experienced the meltdown in public yet, so I am trying to prepare myself and figure out how to handle that as well.

G has a lot of obsessions as well... she absolutely has to wear her rain boots and rain coat to daycare every day. And, she is now flipping out if I try to put a shirt on her that she doesn't approve. She definitely knows what she wants and isn't afraid to let us know. I wonder if this is any indication of what she'll be like as a teenager?

Things with me are going ok. I was supposed to be losing weight, but the scale keeps moving in the wrong direction. I know it's my fault and I'm not doing what I should be doing, but I just can't find the motivation anywhere. I am going to zumba at least once a week so I'm starting to do something. I just need to get my shit together so that I can live the life I want.