It's Started

Despite doubling my progesterone, spotting has started today. Light pink, barely there, but it's started. I am sad and not sure how to process everything I'm feeling. There's guilt, sadness, anger, you name it. Little G has stopped asking questions about the baby. She's resilient.

I have been thinking about it... this baby gave me a gift. I got to see what an amazing, loving sister Little G would be. She was so excited, interested and loving towards it. Drawing pictures of our family and planning for the future. It was wonderful to see. I also got the surprise pregnancy announcement I had always longed for. There was joy.

My heart is breaking, but even for the short time it was with us this baby was loved and a gift.